Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Uh! I'll have the King Cobra for lunch please!

  To begin this week, I want to dedicate it to all of you that sent well wishes and comments regarding last week's blog.  For those of you that have been following along you know that this week began on a sad note,  but, by the end it was extremely gratifying.  So without further delay here is the blog for this week.

This week's civilized question:  Is it more civilized to have fast food restaurants that serve processed food or to have restaurants that have live animals in cages in which you point to them and then they cook it on the spot in front of you?  Hmmm!!!!

TEACHING:  Teaching this week was all about getting ready for midterms.  Monday and Tuesday I spent the time finishing up the last of the topics I wanted to get done before the exam.  Wednesday I was with Claire representing the school at The HSBC Champions event.  I will share more about that later in the blog, because I can't wait to tell you about the most exciting part about teaching this week.  On Thursday and Friday I had the distinct pleasure of Invigilating.  I commented to one of the staff members that the term Invigilator is one of the reason the colonists separated from England.  Invigilating is a very English custom.  In the states we call it proctoring. With proctoring we go sign out our tubs from Cindy Vining and then return them at the end.  When you Invigilate you go to the sign out room, get a briefcase with handcuffs attached and then walk down the hall to the classroom.  I felt like James Bond delivering secret documents.  By the way my real name is James.  Anyway the students are then all seated and a Chinese teacher comes in with the key to the handcuffs and the briefcase.  The Chinese teacher then passes out the test ten minutes before the time begins and the students just sit there facing forward.  When the time begins the students start diligently working on the exam.  While the students work on the exam, you would think that the teachers would grade papers or work on planning.  But oh no!!!  The teachers sit facing each other, one at the back of the room and the other at the front.  You are not allowed to do anything for an hour and a half.  Oh, and unlike standardized tests at home where the kids finish in fifteen minutes, these kids actually work the entire hour and a half.  So, a message to those of you that complain about the standardized testing process.  "Just shut up!!!"  Until you Invigilate you will never know the pain I felt over the three tests that I had to do.  Oh, by the way,  when you Invigilate you don't do your own class or subject.  So, when I get back to the states and do standardized testing I will do it with a cheerful smile and thank my lucky stars that I am back where testing is more like a three day vacation, rather than a stay in solitary confinement.  I occupied my time by  the way by having conversations with myself in Mandarin.  You would probably think this is a good idea, but my Mandarin skills are so limited the conversations didn't last that long.  By the way, the James Bond reference is rather fictitious, but the rules for testing are still pretty strict.  I know I shouldn't have to state the obvious, but you never know in this world today.

Ian Poulter and Martin Kaymer with Chinese Jr. Golf group.  Claire is on the far right.
Yes,  Those are red bunkers!!!
ADVENTURES:  This week's adventures begin on Wednesday.  Claire and I were chosen to represent the school at the HSBC World Champions Golf Tournament in Shenzhen.  Shenzhen is the home of the Mission Hills Golf Facility.  The Mission Hills Golf Facility is the largest golf facility in the world.  I know I mentioned in previous blogs that China doesn't do anything small and this is another example of that.  There are 22 golf courses, with 396 holes to play!!!!!!!!  Claire and I thought we had gone to golf heaven when we arrived.  It is amazingly beautiful and the golf courses are immaculate.
Guanyin, Buddhist Goddess of Mercy.  Rather appropriate for a golf course!!!
Entirely made of Marble
  We arrived very early that morning and there was some confusion as to where the clinic was going to be that morning.    Apparently we were the first participants and nobody knew what to do with us.  So to our great pleasure we were sent to the Starbucks at the resort to wait and have breakfast.  Now for those of you that know me, I have this saying.  "Good things always seem to happen to me at Starbucks".  This morning was no exception.  For those of you that are not golfers, this will be a good time for you to open a tab in Google to research, while the golfers in the group can just sit back and enjoy and imagine the scene for Claire and I.   While having my latte and Claire her hot chocolate, who should walk up but none other than Phil Mickelson.  He was dressed casually and was wearing a San Diego Padres baseball hat.  While he was waiting for his coffee, I introduced myself and asked if he wouldn't mind meeting Claire.  He said he would be delighted and spent about 5 minutes with us discussing China and North San Diego County.  He also asked Claire how she liked getting her picture taken randomly.  Claire said that she didn't mind and that it is kind of funny.  Phil mentioned that his daughter didn't like it very much.  Phil politely said that he needed to get going so we said good bye.  I was thinking to myself, how can the day get much better.  We are out of school for the day for a golf event (Which to many of you know is normal for me.  Come on, somebody has to do it.), we get Starbucks and we meet Phil Mickelson.  Well the story just keeps getting better and better.  We had just sat down to enjoy our drinks again and who should walk up to talk with some gentlemen sitting next to us, but our hometown boy Nick Watney.  Nick was there fresh off of his win the previous week, in which he beat Tiger down the stretch.  He noticed Claire when he was done talking with the men and said hello.  He then stayed and talked with us, much like Phil did.  We talked about China and how we were living here for the year and that Oakhurst was our home.  He asked Claire a few questions about the differences between China and home, as well as how her golf game was progressing.  He and I talked a little about The First Tee of Fresno.  After breakfast we wandered out into the HSBC activity center.  I hit some balls out of a bunker and Claire got a quick lesson from one of the Shenzhen instructors from their golf academy.  He was a nice lad from England named Stewart.  The instructors were all very friendly and impressed with Claire.  We finally made our way to the China Junior Golf Clinic.  The clinic was hosted by IMG and featured Ian Poulter and Martin Kaymer(Last year's Champion at this event).  Claire was in the group with Martin Kaymer and he watched her swing to analyze it.  It makes a father/coach proud that one of the premier players of the game can only suggest that she stand a little away from the ball.  Claire did very well and Martin told her that he would be watching out for her on the LPGA tour in a few years.  After the clinic, we walked around the golf courses and chatted with a few more awesome players like Luke Donald and Ernie Els.  At this tournament there are so few people that are out to watch, the players feel like they have the time to chat.  Most tournaments in the states the crowds are two to three people deep.  There was one final episode that was rather funny toward the end of the day.  There was a small group of Chinese people standing near the 17th tee to get a picture with Graeme McDowell(He was the last US Champion at Pebble Beach).  We were standing nearby while they took the picture with him.
Claire and her new coach, Martin Kaymer!!!
As soon as he walked away, they saw Claire and asked to get a picture with her as well.  I commented to Claire, "See you don't even have to win a U.S. Open to be famous, you already are famous".  She kind of snickered and gave me a little punch in the arm.  We finished our afternoon by walking to this huge marble statue that overlooks the golf courses.  I am not quite sure what it was for, but I will find out when I can.  It was a great father daughter day!!!!
Cobra for lunch Anyone?????
  The next part of my blog is about some of the finer culinary adventures that you can have while staying in China.  As I was on my scooter on the way to the driving range the next day,(I can't believe I got scooter and driving range in the same sentence. It seems like a vague theme that runs throughout my blogs)  anyway,  I was feeling the pangs of hunger during my little excursion so I decided to stop at this restaurant that I had seen on many of my travels near our home.  As I drove into the parking lot, I could see all of the tanks of seafood that were available to choose from.  So, I parked my scooter and went to take a look.  As I got closer I came to realize this was not the same as some of the other restaurants I had seen before.  It was more upscale and had more to choose from.  Not only were there tanks with every kind of seafood and fish to choose from, I was astonished to find three cages that had live snakes in them.  The two bottom cages had multi-colored snakes in them, but it was the top cage that surprised and unnerved me the most.  In it were three large King Cobras.  Now understand these cages that they are in do not have plastic on the outside to prevent people from sticking their fingers in to touch the snakes.  Also there was nothing there to prevent the King Cobra from spitting at you.  While I was there one of them was up in the traditional position with its hood open waving back and forth like it was ready to bite something or someone.  I did manage to get a picture of it without getting viper venom on me.  After seeing the snakes I was too creeped out to eat lunch there so I went to a coffee shop nearby and had a personal pan pizza.  I needed some comfort food after that shock of the cobra.  The next day I took the girls to see the restaurant.  They were creeped out as well.  We do plan on going to that restaurant one evening with a group of friends.  The group has said that when we go, we have to order non traditional dishes to share.  I don't know if I can bring myself to order the king cobra.  I may have to go with the gooeyduck.  If push comes to shove I would order the King Cobra over the Puffer Fish.  At least ordering cobra doesn't come with a waiver that you have to sign, like you do with the Puffer.  One person dies per year eating Puffer Fish on average.  Come on, can it really taste that good?  I bet it just tastes like chicken anyway.
Goungzhou Pearl River Walk Outside Symphony Hall
This was also the view from 22 floors up!!!!
  To end the week we spent  early Saturday shopping in Goungzhou together   We spent the day in Goungzhou because Cecelia and I were going to go on a romantic evening to dinner and the symphony.  When we found our hotel, the reservation was not exactly what was shown on expedia. First of all the desk clerk was arguing with me regarding the fact that I asked for two beds and not one king sized bed for our family.  Apparently, they made an exception for us and gave us the penthouse.  As we excitedly rode the elevator to the top of the hotel, we had visions of spa tubs and a spacious room with an incredible room.  Instead what we got was a small room with moldy,peeling walls, two twin beds, and a view of the backside of the hotel.  One of the things we have discovered is that you get what you pay for in China.  I thought I was getting a great deal at 535 rmb per night.  That is roughly $85.  We weren't real pleased with the room, but I booked it on Expedia and we just chalked it up as a lesson learned.  We went to go get the girls pizza for the evening.  On the way back, I told Cecelia that I wanted to go see what the rates were for the Ramada across the street.  I figured that next time we would just make a reservation there.  While talking with the front desk, they said they had a room available and that they would let me see it.  They took me to the 22nd floor and opened the curtains to the room to show me the view.  It didn't take more than a second to turn around to the bell boy and tell him that I wanted the room and to call the front desk immediately.  It may have been a rash, non thinking moment on my part, but the view and the room far surpassed the room across the street.  I called Cecelia and told her to have the girls help her pack up, because we were moving across the street.  The room cost me an additional 950 rmb($110), but it was totally worth it.  The look on Cecelia and the girls faces when they saw the view was priceless.  The view overlooked the Pearl River and the entire skyline of Guangzhou.  It also had a direct view of the Guangzhou tower.  While we got ready for dinner and the symphony, the girls set up camp in front of the picture windows.  They were going to watch movies, but the view was so amazing they couldn't break away from it.  When we left they had just ordered dessert from room service and were settling in for the night.
Small Cocktail
  Cecelia and I left the hotel dressed to the nines.  I in my fitted tux and fake Rolex feeling like James Bond with a Bond girl on my arm. ( I did mention that my real name is James didn't I?) Cecelia, was dressed in a flowing blue gown with scarf and heals, looking like Grace Kelly.  We then made our way by taxi to the restaurant where we were meeting our teacher friends that were also going to the symphony.  The restaurant was called Rendevous.  It is a French/Vietnamese restaurant right on the Pearl River.  We had an amazing meal.  I had seven courses that included scallops and a very nice steak and Cecelia had lamb chops and a salad.  We also shared a bottle of wine.  The amazing thing is that it only cost us about $60 for dinner.  We then took a cab to the symphony hall for the concert.  The symphony was excellent and featured the most animated piano soloist I have ever seen.  He was part formal pianist and lounge player all wrapped up in one. Some of his motions while playing were so exaggerated that it was rather comical.  The symphony itself was outstanding, particularly the string section.  After the concert, we hopped in another cab with one of our friends and went to the Party Pier to have a late night cocktail.  The atmosphere was amazing.  We sat in a giant wicker ball that had plastic furniture that had lights in them, that would change colors while you sat in them.  At around 12:30 Cecelia and I took our final cab ride back to the hotel.  When we got to the room we had one last look at the view before going to bed.  I commented to Cecelia, "Are we sure that we are in China?"  After the evening we had, I wasn't sure if we were in New York or San Francisco.
Leslie P. dream!!!
  The next morning we woke up and headed into the city on the metro.  We have become quite adept and getting around.  We made our way to the wholesale clothing market to buy underwear and shoes.  The shoe market would make Leslie Peterson go out of her mind. Her head might just spontaneously combust because there are so many different varieties.  Either that or she would buy so many pairs that Eric would have to get two more jobs to pay for them.  We also bought cheese and wine before we went home.
  Earlier, I mentioned that I wasn't sure if I was in New York or San Francisco.  On the way home realty struck and we knew that we weren't in either of those cities, because after a weekend like we had in which I got to pretend I was a high roller by wearing my tux, my fake Rolex (It keeps great time by the way) and treating my smoking hot wife to dinner and the symphony,  I still had money in my pocket.  A weekend like that would have cost me a couple of grand in those cities.  All told, I spent around $500.  That included the room that I had to pay for, even though we didn't stay in it.  I also forgot to mention that the symphony tickets that I paid for were the best seats in the house.  Hmmm!!! I believe I have an inkling for the next civilized or un-civilized question for next week.
  After a weekend like that, I know my mom and dad are looking down on me and saying.  "What a great son we raised, I hope he remembers to thank God for all of the great things he has been given."


 Oh, I will mom and dad, I will.  Thanks for everything that you have given me as well.  I love you both.

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